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The High Performance Podcast

Gary Barlow: Take That's Lost Era & Finding My Way Back

56 min episode · 2 min read
·
Gary Barlow

Episode

56 min

Read time

2 min

Topics

Health & Wellness, Relationships

AI-Generated Summary

Key Takeaways

  • Creative Confidence Fragility: Confidence in creative work requires complete self-belief to produce anything meaningful. Once chipped away through failure, it fragments rapidly into many pieces. Barlow stopped playing piano for three years after his failed American launch, unable to create without the foundational belief that had previously driven his songwriting success throughout Take That's peak years.
  • Public Shame Response: After media ridicule and Robbie Williams' contrasting success, Barlow deliberately gained significant weight to become unrecognizable in public. This prevented painful encounters where people would mention Williams' achievements. He describes this as killing the pop star identity to regain control, spending three months at home after each public comment to avoid further humiliation and shame.
  • Rehearsal as Foundation: Barlow's father equated rehearsal with real work, viewing preparation as the only legitimate aspect of music. When Barlow performed unrehearsed at Clive Davis' pre-Grammy party with a remixed track he couldn't follow, the catastrophic failure reinforced this lesson. He now refuses any performance without extensive preparation, recognizing that expecting spontaneous rescue from difficulty never works professionally.
  • Recovery Through Movement: Barlow's first step toward recovery involved running daily for two years despite being significantly overweight and still smoking. Exercise transformed his songwriting ability and overall mental state. He advocates that exercise in any form, even walking, fundamentally changes a person's capacity to function. Physical movement preceded his ability to return to music and creative work.
  • Partnership Support Strategy: Barlow's wife never questioned his empty studio days or confronted his struggles during the seven-year decline. She provided judgment-free support, only intervening when he became mentally distant from family life. He credits this approach with maintaining their relationship through multiple crises, including their daughter Poppy's death, defying the 97 percent divorce rate for couples experiencing such loss.

What It Covers

Gary Barlow recounts his seven-year collapse after Take That's split, when solo success in America failed catastrophically. He describes gaining weight as armor against public shaming, losing creative confidence completely, and pretending to work while staring at his piano. His recovery came through rejoining the band, running daily, and rediscovering music as therapy.

Key Questions Answered

  • Creative Confidence Fragility: Confidence in creative work requires complete self-belief to produce anything meaningful. Once chipped away through failure, it fragments rapidly into many pieces. Barlow stopped playing piano for three years after his failed American launch, unable to create without the foundational belief that had previously driven his songwriting success throughout Take That's peak years.
  • Public Shame Response: After media ridicule and Robbie Williams' contrasting success, Barlow deliberately gained significant weight to become unrecognizable in public. This prevented painful encounters where people would mention Williams' achievements. He describes this as killing the pop star identity to regain control, spending three months at home after each public comment to avoid further humiliation and shame.
  • Rehearsal as Foundation: Barlow's father equated rehearsal with real work, viewing preparation as the only legitimate aspect of music. When Barlow performed unrehearsed at Clive Davis' pre-Grammy party with a remixed track he couldn't follow, the catastrophic failure reinforced this lesson. He now refuses any performance without extensive preparation, recognizing that expecting spontaneous rescue from difficulty never works professionally.
  • Recovery Through Movement: Barlow's first step toward recovery involved running daily for two years despite being significantly overweight and still smoking. Exercise transformed his songwriting ability and overall mental state. He advocates that exercise in any form, even walking, fundamentally changes a person's capacity to function. Physical movement preceded his ability to return to music and creative work.
  • Partnership Support Strategy: Barlow's wife never questioned his empty studio days or confronted his struggles during the seven-year decline. She provided judgment-free support, only intervening when he became mentally distant from family life. He credits this approach with maintaining their relationship through multiple crises, including their daughter Poppy's death, defying the 97 percent divorce rate for couples experiencing such loss.

Notable Moment

Barlow describes sitting in his studio for years pretending to work, telling his family he was recording while actually doing nothing, just staring at the piano that once produced hits. He would watch the clock until four o'clock, then emerge claiming he had a productive day, slowly going insane while qualified for absolutely nothing outside music.

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Episode Transcript

So I went through this whole period then of being unhappily overweight, but kind of happy because it was doing something for me. Yeah. It was a great coat of armor, and I'd killed the pop star. So it was like I'd controlled something for the first time in ages. And it sounds it sounds incredibly dark what I'm saying here, but that's the way I was thinking at that point. That is the distinctive voice of legendary singer songwriter Gary Barlow. Now if you're a fan of Take That or even if you're not, you will, of course, know the story by now. And I hope, like me, you've enjoyed the recent Netflix documentary that has charted the highs, but also the lows of their time together, including the big split and the comeback. But I guess what the cameras couldn't capture was the internal collapse of just one man during the band's darkest period because Gary was the songwriter. He was the leader. He was the kid who grew up dreaming of being a musician. He's the one that everyone expected would then go on to have the huge solo success. Yet the reality is that he was drowning whilst Robbie was soaring. The band had split. Robbie was enjoying this unprecedented solo success. And Gary, well, he was trying to launch himself in America with a cover version that he hadn't written on a remix he didn't understand at a pre Grammy party he wasn't ready for and didn't wanna be at. And what happened next would define the next seven or so years of his life. This is a remarkably honest conversation. One of the most open we've had about failure, about shame, about the fragility of creative confidence, what it actually takes to rebuild yourself when you've lost everything that defines you. If you love to take that, if you don't, if you've watched the Netflix documentary, even if you haven't, this is gonna give you an insight into a man who really bravely and brilliantly opens up to us. As Gary takes us from that despair in New York when he actually thought that everything was over, through seven years of darkness to find his way back through the very thing that had defeated him, which was the band. And isn't it great to see Take That and Gary flying once again as we welcome Gary Barlow to High Performance. It's a perfect press story that two guys from the same band are coming out. One's making great music. We're hearing from someone we've never even we've never even heard his voice before, this guy. You know, we've never heard him write songs before, and they're great songs versus this guy who is now a watered down version of who he was before he went to America. It just was it just played itself out as badly as it could. And so by the time we'd sort of re released two records that didn't …

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