Brené with Debbie Millman on Why Design Matters
Episode
73 min
Read time
2 min
Topics
Career Growth, Relationships, Design & UX
AI-Generated Summary
Key Takeaways
- ✓Hope-to-shame ratio: Success requires maintaining just one notch more hope and optimism than shame about what's possible. This minimal margin—not complete confidence—provides enough fuel to persist through rejection and failure over decades of creative work.
- ✓Confidence versus courage: Confidence comes from successful repetition of any endeavor, making it impossible to feel confident before trying something new. Courage to step into uncertainty matters more than waiting for confidence that will never arrive beforehand. Even Barbra Streisand uses teleprompters despite decades of performing.
- ✓Regret's unique toxicity: Unlike grief, sadness, or even failure, regret cannot be metabolized because it lacks closure. The endless what-if scenarios keep spinning without resolution, making fear of regret a more powerful motivator than fear of failure when deciding whether to pursue creative work.
- ✓Branding as human DNA: Mark-making began ten thousand years ago with religious symbols, evolved through family crests and flags, was appropriated by corporations for two hundred years, and now returns to individuals creating movements like Black Lives Matter using identical consensus-building principles.
- ✓Curation versus discernment: Discernment involves decision-making from external inputs coming toward you, while curation describes how you intentionally move through the world. Both intersect but originate from different neural pathways—one reactive, one proactive in designing your life with deliberate choices.
What It Covers
Brené Brown interviews designer Debbie Millman about her new book featuring conversations with creative leaders, exploring how shame versus hope drives creative careers, the relationship between branding and human belonging, and what enables people to design meaningful lives.
Key Questions Answered
- •Hope-to-shame ratio: Success requires maintaining just one notch more hope and optimism than shame about what's possible. This minimal margin—not complete confidence—provides enough fuel to persist through rejection and failure over decades of creative work.
- •Confidence versus courage: Confidence comes from successful repetition of any endeavor, making it impossible to feel confident before trying something new. Courage to step into uncertainty matters more than waiting for confidence that will never arrive beforehand. Even Barbra Streisand uses teleprompters despite decades of performing.
- •Regret's unique toxicity: Unlike grief, sadness, or even failure, regret cannot be metabolized because it lacks closure. The endless what-if scenarios keep spinning without resolution, making fear of regret a more powerful motivator than fear of failure when deciding whether to pursue creative work.
- •Branding as human DNA: Mark-making began ten thousand years ago with religious symbols, evolved through family crests and flags, was appropriated by corporations for two hundred years, and now returns to individuals creating movements like Black Lives Matter using identical consensus-building principles.
- •Curation versus discernment: Discernment involves decision-making from external inputs coming toward you, while curation describes how you intentionally move through the world. Both intersect but originate from different neural pathways—one reactive, one proactive in designing your life with deliberate choices.
Notable Moment
Millman reveals she survived four years of sexual abuse as a child but stayed silent because her abuser threatened to kill her family. When she finally disclosed it as potential pregnancy, a doctor dismissed her claims, attributing physical evidence to a secret boyfriend instead.
Episode Transcript
Hi, everyone. I'm Brene Brown, and this is Dare to Lead. Can you hear me grinning? It's so obnoxious underneath talking. You know, when you can tell someone's smiling the whole time they're talking. That would be me right now. Why? Because I'm talking to my friend, Debbie Millman, today. We've had her on Unlocking Us. I've been on her podcast. Dang. She's incredible. Designer, educator, curator, brand strategist, host of the long running multi award winning podcast Design Matters, author of seven books, including her new book, Design Matters, Conversations with the World's Most Creative People. Today, we talk about everything from curating this new book. I actually think she, like, almost invented podcasting. When you hear the story about her first kind of podcast that wasn't even called a podcast back then, you may agree with me that she maybe invented this art form. We talk about her new book. We talk about the politics of curation. What is curation? How is it different than discernment? We talk about what is good design? Talk about what is the soul of a creative life, what gets in the way of a creative life. We, of course, talk about shame and worthiness, and some of our answers just just incredible. I can't wait for you to hear this. I'm glad you're here. This is one of those things that, like, if you're at home, you need to grab the big mug of tea, like in the commercials with your hands wrapped gently around it, and you're wearing a wool sweater with kind of extra long sleeves. This is that kind of podcast. Support for this show comes from Odoo. Running a business is hard enough, so why make it harder with a dozen different apps that don't talk to each other? Introducing Odoo. It's the only business software you'll ever need. It's an all in one fully integrated platform that makes your work easier. CRM, accounting, inventory, e commerce and more. And the best part? Odoo replaces multiple expensive platforms for a fraction of the cost. That's why over thousands of businesses have made the switch. So why not you? Try Odoo for free at odoo.com. That's odoo.com. Support for this show comes from Odoo. Running a business is hard enough, so why make it harder with a dozen different apps that don't talk to each other? Introducing Odoo. It's the only business software you'll ever need. It's an all in one fully integrated platform that makes your work easier. CRM, accounting, inventory, e commerce and more. And the best part? Odoo replaces multiple expensive platforms for a fraction of the cost. That's why over thousands of businesses have made the switch. So why not you? Try Odoo for free at odoo.com. That's odoo.com. Alright. Before we get started and jump into this great conversation with Debbie, let me tell you a little bit about her. She has been named one of the most creative people in the business by …
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Books, tools, and gear mentioned in this episode
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Books
- <UNKNOWN>By guest
by Debbie Millman
“Brené Brown interviews designer Debbie Millman about her new book featuring conversations with creative leaders”
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