Brené and Ashley on Living BIG, Part 2 of 2

What It Covers

Brené Brown and her sister Ashley explore the Living BIG framework—setting boundaries with integrity and generosity—and examine whether people are truly doing their best, addressing anger, resentment, and grief work.

Key Questions Answered

• •Living BIG Framework: Boundaries, Integrity, and Generosity work together by asking what boundaries enable you to maintain integrity while being generous toward others. Without boundaries, generosity becomes resentment; without integrity, boundaries become punishment rather than protection.
• •Grief Underneath Anger: When you believe someone is not doing their best, you maintain hope they will change. Accepting they are doing their best requires grieving what you will never receive from them, which most people avoid by staying angry and resentful instead.
• •Moving the Rock Strategy: A special forces leader realized he spent energy pushing an immovable rock—yelling at and belittling a struggling team member. Accepting the person was doing their best meant apologizing and relocating them to where they could contribute successfully.
• •Parental Relationship Boundaries: Establishing clear boundaries with parents—defining what is acceptable versus unacceptable—while accepting their limitations creates more loving, honest relationships. This requires grief work about unmet needs but prevents repeatedly returning to a dry well expecting water.