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Dare to Lead with Brené Brown

Brené and Barrett on BRAVING Trust, Part 1 of 2

41 min episode · 2 min read

Episode

41 min

Read time

2 min

Topics

Career Growth, Relationships, Software Development

AI-Generated Summary

Key Takeaways

  • Marble Jar Concept: Trust builds through tiny consistent moments, not sweeping gestures. Like a classroom marble jar that fills with good behavior, workplace trust accumulates through small daily actions like asking about someone's weekend or checking in after noticing distraction during meetings.
  • Two-Word Check-Ins: Start meetings by having each person share two words describing their current state. Leaders must follow up privately with struggling team members asking what support looks like, which takes under five minutes but prevents micro-betrayals and builds psychological safety systematically.
  • Sliding Door Moments: John Gottman's research shows trust builds or breaks in split-second decisions. Stopping to check on a sad colleague instead of rushing past represents trust-building, while ignoring distress constitutes betrayal. These micro-moments determine relationship trajectories more than major events.
  • Leader Permission Setting: Whatever leaders bring into meetings becomes acceptable for the team. Starting with vulnerability and humanity signals that feelings matter alongside deliverables. Without explicit invitation, team members compartmentalize struggles, reducing performance and creating distrust through emotional severing and disconnection.

What It Covers

Brené Brown and Barrett Guillen introduce the BRAVING framework for building workplace trust through small daily moments rather than grand gestures, explaining why trust conversations feel threatening and how marble jar moments accumulate over time.

Key Questions Answered

  • Marble Jar Concept: Trust builds through tiny consistent moments, not sweeping gestures. Like a classroom marble jar that fills with good behavior, workplace trust accumulates through small daily actions like asking about someone's weekend or checking in after noticing distraction during meetings.
  • Two-Word Check-Ins: Start meetings by having each person share two words describing their current state. Leaders must follow up privately with struggling team members asking what support looks like, which takes under five minutes but prevents micro-betrayals and builds psychological safety systematically.
  • Sliding Door Moments: John Gottman's research shows trust builds or breaks in split-second decisions. Stopping to check on a sad colleague instead of rushing past represents trust-building, while ignoring distress constitutes betrayal. These micro-moments determine relationship trajectories more than major events.
  • Leader Permission Setting: Whatever leaders bring into meetings becomes acceptable for the team. Starting with vulnerability and humanity signals that feelings matter alongside deliverables. Without explicit invitation, team members compartmentalize struggles, reducing performance and creating distrust through emotional severing and disconnection.

Notable Moment

A PhD program leader told Brené her academic career was finished upon learning of her pregnancy, demonstrating how organizational cultures historically punished personal life integration. This contrasts sharply with current MBA students who demand workplaces allowing full humanity without artificial personal-professional separation.

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Episode Transcript

Hi, everyone. I'm Brene Brown, and this is Dare to Lead. So a couple of episodes back, we talked to Charles Feldman about his incredible book, The Thin Book of Trust. And we talked about what it means to build trust between people in teams in organizations. And so, Barrett, welcome. Hi. So happy to be back. I thought you and I could really dig into how we talk about trust here at Brene Brown Education Research Group. I'd love to. Yeah. We'll talk about the marble jar. We'll talk about braving trust, the acronym we have for the seven attributes of trust, how we use that. We'll just jump into the whole thing. And maybe we can also talk about some of the barriers that we see when we teach this, when we train it. Sounds great. I'm excited. Yeah. What do you think is the most important thing about trust? That's a really good question. For me, it feels very much like a cycle. The more I have trust in my team, the more productive we are, the more I feel like I can rely on them and count on them and feel, like, really in the trenches with them. And so for me, it's just especially at work, it's such a a cycle of these small moments that build trust, more productivity, more leaning on each other, and more asking for what we need. It's just a complete cycle. And what does it feel like when it breaks? Like a shit show. Nobody knows who's juggling the balls. And at any minute, we know there's gonna be a ball dropping. It doesn't feel cohesive. It's true. That's a really good way to put it. Yeah. It's kind of everything, isn't it? It it does. It does feel like everything. Yeah. Alright. We'll dig into what we've learned about practicing it, what we've learned from teaching probably tens of thousands of people. Yeah. Support for this show comes from Odoo. Running a business is hard enough, so why make it harder with a dozen different apps that don't talk to each other? Introducing Odoo. It's the only business software you'll ever need. It's an all in one fully integrated platform that makes your work easier. CRM, accounting, inventory, e commerce and more. And the best part? Odoo replaces multiple expensive platforms for a fraction of the cost. That's why over thousands of businesses have made the switch. So why not you? Try Odoo for free at odoo.com. That's odoo.com. Support for this show comes from Odoo. Running a business is hard enough, so why make it harder with a dozen different apps that don't talk to each other? Introducing Odoo. It's the only business software you'll ever need. It's an all in one fully integrated platform that makes your work easier. CRM, accounting, inventory, e commerce and more. And the best part? Odoo replaces multiple expensive platforms for a fraction of the cost. That's why over thousands of …

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    Brené Brown and Barrett Guillen introduce the BRAVING framework for building workplace trust through small daily moments rather than grand gestures

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